Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Uncle Don

February 18, 2015
For some reason, this morning I found myself thinking about my dear Uncle Don. He was the organist at St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York City for 40 years and I began searching videos on YouTube in hopes of finding one of him playing the organ. I was pleasantly surprised to discover this video of the Christmas Eve Midnight Mass on December 24, 2012… the last Christmas Eve Mass he was to play. Though he had no idea at the time, six months later his life was going to be forever changed; a change that would eventually force him into retirement; a change that would lead him to move to Minnesota to be near family.
Uncle Don & my brother, Ken, 2014
Uncle Don & my brother, Mark, 2014

I then remembered that I had written about Uncle Don after visiting him in a Rehab center in NYC in November 2013, intending to post it on my blog, but had never done so. Well, today’s the day! He is now living in a retirement center in frigid MinneSOta, near family and is doing quite well. He occasionally plays the organ in the lounge and, I have been told, draws quite a crowd.
Drawing a crowd, 2014
I’m going to be in Minnesota in two weeks and will have the privilege of seeing him. I’m hoping to persuade him to “tickle the ivories” for me, which I know will transport me back in time… to a time filled with fond memories and vivid images. This post is for you, Uncle Don. I love you more than you’ll ever know…
Uncle Don's Retirement Party, May 2014

Doing what he loves best...


(Here’s the link to the video I mentioned above and below is the blog I wrote in November 2013)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7UuzECLqNI&list=FLSCZu4S-q0s1F_2dCj5Hafg&index=52

November 2013

Pomp and Circumstance. That's the piece I'm listening to right now as I sit on the plane, headed home from a visit to New York City with my mom and brother, Mark. It's a cut from the album my Uncle Don recorded years ago. As tears flow down my cheeks, I'm sure everyone around me thinks I'm an emotional mess. And they're right. I'm a mess. I'm just so sad and I can't make the tears stop.

We were in NYC visiting Don in a rehabilitation center. He's recovering from being hit (as a pedestrian) by a car back in July. After spending two months in ICU, one month in the hospital and the past month in Rehab, he's still got so far to go. And he's not playing the organ at St. Patrick's Cathedral these days; a job he's held for the past forty years. Wow... FORTY YEARS! That church, the priests, sisters and choir members have been his family and he couldn't have been any happier. He was one of the fortunate ones... he had a job that he absolutely loved and he was an amazing organist.
Donald Dumler


He loved his family at St. Pat’s and they loved him. What's not to love about Uncle Don, though? He's loving, funny, quirky and amazingly talented. And humble. And a perfectionist. I suppose that's what made him so good at what he did. But at the age of 75, after being so sick for such a long time, we don't know what the future holds for him. That's sad. Will he ever play the organ again? We talked him into playing a bit of Toccata and a Fugue in D Minor by Bach on a small keyboard that's in his room last Thursday when we were there and so many memories came flooding back as I sat and listened to him (I secretly videotaped it and will always treasure that moment).

When my family lived in New Jersey during the late '70's, we would drive into NYC every Christmas Eve to attend the midnight mass and listen to him play. He would come home with us after the service and spend a couple days at our house and I'll never forget standing around the piano, listening to him practice and begging him to play all our favorite pieces. My dad loved Pomp and Circumstance. We all loved Toccata and Fugue in D minor (aka: the Halloween song) and my favorite was Prelude and Fugue in D Major (it was a happy song)! But the best part of it was that he was an organist and when he was playing piano, there were no foot pedals. So he'd be playing along and all of a sudden, his feet would begin to move, as though there were imaginary pedals on the ground that he was playing. Sometimes he would hum that part so that the piece sounded right, like he was filling in the blanks. And then he'd start shaking his head and apologizing... he would say how sorry he was that it didn't sound right. But what he didn't ever understand was how amazed we all were by the talent that was sitting before us. We would listen to him play for hours on end.

Did I mention that he was quirky? I think that's one of the things we loved most about him! He rarely sleeps. He drinks Dr. Pepper for breakfast, which is usually around noon. He actually wrote a Dr. Pepper jingle back in the day and he sang it for us on Thursday. What a treat that was! He lived on his own in an apartment across the street from Central Park and never owned a car. I'm not even sure if he ever had a driver’s license... he certainly hasn't ever had a New York license. He is very picky about what he eats and is adamant that it be healthy. He is a very solitary man, yet he has amazing friends. I had the privilege of meeting one of his dearest friends, Sal Basile last week. Don is a lucky man to have such a dear friend. (As an aside, Sal wrote a book called "Fifth Avenue Famous" about the history of music at St. Patrick's Cathedral and he includes many stories about Don.)

His mind never strayed far from music day and night. It was his life. It was his love; his passion. And I have a feeling that we've reached the end of an era. That's what is so sad. One minute he was living his dream and the next minute, he was hit by a car and in the ICU, fighting for his life. None of us ever thought it would happen like that. But as I know, oh so well, life can change in the blink of an eye and sideswipe us in ways we never imagined possible.

At this point, we don't know what the future holds for dear Uncle Don. My dream is for him to recover to the point that he is once again able to play the organ, perhaps giving lessons and playing concerts. We're not sure if he'll stay in NYC or perhaps move to Minnesota, where he can be close to my mom (his sister), dad, my brother Ken and his family. We would all love to see that happen. Perhaps it's selfish on our parts, but we want to be able to see him more often and be a part of his life. And I think that living near family would be wonderful for him. But time will tell. For now, we're just taking it a day at a time and praying that he will recover to the point that he would perhaps be able to live in an assisted living facility. We want nothing more than for him to regain his strength and get his independence back. But he's frustrated with himself and he's tired of being so dependent on others for everything. I can't blame him either. I will continue to pray for him daily…

3 comments:

  1. Thank you. Don lived across the street from me, was my younger sister's classmate, and played (as a high-school sophomore) at my older sister's wedding.

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  2. In the late 1950's early 1960's, for a brief time Mr. Dumler was the organist at St. James Presbyterian Church in Harlem. Dorothy Maynor(The Opera Star) was the minister's wife and choir director. As as child I remember my mother and many other parishioners praising the young Mr. Dumler by name in conversation.
    In the early 1960's Ms Maynor Founded the Harlem School Of the Arts in the St. James Church Community Center. I studied the piano and even took lessons on the same Organ that Mr. Dumler had commanded years before. While I did not pursue a career in music, I still think of that young Harlem boy who was inspired by Mr. Dumler to try the instrument. He played for the powerful and mighty. But he is also remembered by that little boy in me

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    1. Hi Richard, thank you so much for sharing your memories of Uncle Don. I love hearing stories of how he inspired others through his music! Unfortunately, Don passed away on Palm Sunday 2016. We miss him so much but we like to imagine that when he entered heaven, the music there got even better! Take care, Laura

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